Title : 10 YEARS!!!!!!! and still going on and on....
link : 10 YEARS!!!!!!! and still going on and on....
10 YEARS!!!!!!! and still going on and on....
Well well here we are now.A biggie today.
Feeling the vibes of that full moon last night and the night before - BIGTIME.
I cant say I was happy, but it certainly brought a few things to the surface on healing and shedding some things I would like to leave behind.
Thats what we need to do, shed. Like some little rattle snakes, leave that skin, and move on.
Move on into gratitude and love.
I was at Moon Medicine gathering this Wednesday evening that is held monthly by my dear friend Kathy Scott. She runs them every month on the full moon, for women only. This time around it was held in this beautiful space called The chapel of Ease in Irishtown. She always finds the most lovliest of spaces and I brought down some of my lifewreaths and she had a stunning alter and Lou brought the most beautiful bowl that had lots of cuttings from her garden - Lavendar, sage, eucalyptus etc to hold water. We drank the water and threw it over us after the ceremony.
Kathy runs gatherings and talks - you can check out her website here
www.trailblazery.ie and I am a huge fan of her work and so when she asked myself and Sally Alana Foran, DJ extraordinaire and smooth talker on all subjects, I and the amazing yoga teacher and earth goddess Lou Horgan to share some words, I was honoured.
The theme of the night was 'The Heroines Journey'. Myself and Sally are crafters - grafters and well flappers and so we were to talk about our experience of creating and how it effects our daily lives and Sally went on to speak about her heroine Friday Kahlo. It was incredible. Lou had some of the most beautiful yoga moves and advanced me greatly on my yoga knowledge which to be honest I never realised - Yoga was a mans sport for the last 4,000 years up until recently. Then I spoke about my journey, my inward journey in dealing with a terminal disease (which I dont even call it that now anymore as I dont feel its appropriate. Now its just energy which I am shifting out of me slowly but surely) which I hadnt really prepared for, as I thought I was going to speak about my artwork - but I guess it went hand in hand and so I dived in deep and had a nice reception afterwards with women thanking me for sharing and speaking my truth. It was a real heart warming evening that I was so proud to be part of. It was so emotional in parts for some. I guess all that feminine energy is so powerful for people who dont experience it enough.
I woke up early in the morning to some deep tears, not sure if it was the moon or my own insecurities or an amalgamation of everything going on, but I was so so upset. There was alot of energy going around that night. And so I began to write down alot of things and feelings that arose. I love to get it all off my chest and find this way the most therapeutic. Being around 80 women - its soothing and I felt very vunerable and like Brene Brown said
I feel so vulnerable sharing my story at times, to the point it almost makes me feel very uneasy. I need to drop that, let it go - as the reception I received today was phenomenal. Lovely strangers sending me beautiful messages. So lovely and thank you.
So I have a little anniversary today. 10 years since I discovered the lump in my breast. I think it has been in the back of my subconscious that I have lived with this for this long. And how far I have come. Its been some ride to say the least. When I think back even just three years ago and raising money and going over to Frankfurt and Dr. Vogl asking me was I a complex person as the veins entering my liver were all so knotted and intertwined. I was just recalling that last night to a friend on the phone. I also think I have definitely unknotted some of those knots through my meditation!
Now I see this issue as a dark space that I am slowly but surely releasing from my body. Sure I know more than the oncologists do now - they only study it for 8 years! Ive had this for 10. A pal said this to me last night. Dr. Cribben in da house! What a laugh.
I am ready for the next phase of this life.
Its a beautiful day, need to get out and stretch the body in the biggest way possible.
Ciao for now.
Have a great one.
Fi x
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